Expecting!

On Monday, May 25, 2009 at 4pm my life changed forever. I FINALLY got a positive pregnancy test result. I have been dreaming of this day for as long as I can remember. I had always imagined what this moment would be like. It was NOTHING like I imagined. I was thrilled but all of a sudden I felt extremely overwhelmed and my mind started racing. All I could think was, "We have so much to do." "Can we really afford this?" "What do we do now?" "I need a new car." "Stop smoking, NOW." "Should I tell William now, or wait until the doctor confirms it?" And so on and so on. All the while I am reading the instructions to the HPT over and over again as if it takes a rocket scientist to work these things. Finally, after what seems like a lifetime in the bathroom with my mind racing, I say aloud for the first time ever "I am pregnant."
I am a woman so I can't keep my mouth shut about to much of anything for very long so of course I run to the office to tell William our news. He is sitting there peaceful, content, childless, with no worries in sight, and I blurt out, "We're pregnant." At first I think he was shocked. We were trying to get pregnant so we knew if was coming but I don't think you are ever truly ready for that moment. He takes a breath and says to me, "Damn Right". :) I love him so!
Tomorrow, 05/28/2009 I go for my first appointment since becoming pregnant. It's not my first OB appointment but they will confirm for us that we are indeed expecting. In some ways I need this confirmation from the doctor. I don't "feel" pregnant. I am sure at 5 weeks most women don't. I always envisioned knowing and feeling different once it happened. That's not the case but I am sure that will change very soon.
Tomorrow they will start to ween me off my anti-depressants which scares the hell out of me. They have made life so much easier. Hopefully the joy of being pregnant will be enough to keep my emotions in check for the next 9+ months.